I'm still recovering from this cold. Two Saturdays ago I was on my way to a friend date in Lower Pac Heights. En route I was sitting on the MUNI and there was a literal father and son snot symphony happening behind me. Even though I've experienced my share of viral exposure while in transit (girl can't complain about getting chauffeured around on the city dime too much!), I had a moment of prescience. I totally knew I was going to get sick that day! Yes, I know The Secret would dictate that this very thought is the reason that I "caught" (/gave myself) a cold. The point is: it happened.
By the time it had firmly taken root in my face, the cold threatened to ruin my entire weekend. Yes, I had to cancel some highly anticipated plans, but there were others that simply couldn't be missed, namely: Buckshot & Bordeaux at the Pacific Rod & Gun Club (Clark Gable used to shoot there!). I'd found out about B&B through dapper new friends I met at the Asterisk Magazine Issue Release Party earlier that week. There is nothing on earth that could have kept me from skeet shooting and charcuterie, ghurl. No-thing.
Needless to say my eating and smelling and hearing senses were impaired, which, yeah, was both pseudo dangerous on a gun range but was mostly just kinda sad what with all that delicious food around. Additionally because I'd taken Tylenol "Severe" Cold (which had no effect on me whatsoever; I thought that "Severe" meant it was actually going to work this time), I couldn't booze it up too hard because of the mythical liver damages. I kept asking people nearby how much they believed in liver damage caused by acetaminophen and wine mixing. Conclusion: difficult to say. I decided - to my chagrin - to play it safe. Life always seems shorter and more precious when you're ill, right?
Regardless I was able to make my way through all seven courses, including some zingers like these here quail legs:
1. Move away from families carrying snot on the train.
2. I hate shooting guns.
3. I love food.
4. It's difficult to know how much liver damage one can get from mixing acetominophen and booze.
Use these lessons wisely.
Virgie Tovar, MA is one of the nation's leading experts and lecturers on fat discrimination and body image. She is the founder of Babecamp (a 4 week online course focused on helping people break up with diet culture) and the editor of Hot & Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion (Seal Press, 2012). She writes about the intersections of size, identity, sexuality and politics. See more updates on Facebook.