VIRGIE TOVAR
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The Power of My Fat Body

7/9/2013

 
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After my recent experience with the inappropriate image of me used by the SF Chronicle for an article on whether "obesity" is a disease, I found myself feeling a lot of things: hyper-vigilance, betrayal, a sense of shame for my own naivete, and exhaustion from the aforementioned emotions.

I allowed myself to actually feel all this rather than go into survival mode. My usual impulse is to beef up the emotional armor I've created for myself to buffer me from the culture's unceasing attacks on fat bodies, on women's bodies, on people of color bodies - the intersections where I exist.  

I was frustrated because I knew there was something I was missing. Yes, images of faceless fat women have been used as fetishistic objects to hurt us, but there was something else that I couldn't quite articulate that I knew was there.

And then I figured it out.

My body is so powerful that they couldn't show my face because it would be impossible to hide the joy of my existence. My body is so powerful that they can only show it in bits and pieces, disjointed from the story of my survival. My fat body tells the story of my strength. My fat face sings the truth of my beauty. My body flouts "conventional wisdom," destabilizes a hundred years of lies and half-truths spoken from the mouths of charlatans. My body resists colonial rule; it refuses to be subjected to state-generated ideas of fitness or femininity. I am complete. I am hot. I am complicated. My body holds a lifetime of pain and joy and love, and you can't see me as whole because my fat body is so powerful that it would shatter your world view, make you question the very reason for your existence, thrill your heart, incite your soul.

The desire to suppress my body and my existence reveals the truth of my power.

Photo by Shilo McCabe
Annabel link
7/9/2013 05:48:01 am

<3

LoveLoyalty
7/9/2013 06:01:52 am

I agree. We go through the emotions but we always I hope we all end up eith firm belief and confidence in ones self. It seems it s oksy to post abd advertise faceless women for a negative campaign, than it is to show truth of love and happiness. Believe it if I had the resources I'd create a full spread on the attach of full figured people.

Chrystal Bougon link
7/9/2013 09:19:46 am

It makes me wonder even more as to WHY the mainstream media always cuts off the heads of the people they are showing in their news reports when they are talking about obesity. Maybe they too are too afraid to show a joyful, sexy, beautiful face to go with that curvy body. It's so dehumanizing. It pisses me off when I see those headless bodies on the news. Thanks for being so real and authentic. I am sharing with my Curvies, Virgie.

Tricia
7/9/2013 10:20:36 am

you rock :)

Jennifer Sánchez
7/9/2013 11:27:35 am

I love you!!

Kalamity
7/9/2013 03:21:09 pm

<3

steph link
7/10/2013 12:06:07 am

I just found this blog and you are my new hero. <3 You are an inspiration.

christine
7/10/2013 03:56:12 am

Media portrayals of pregnant bodies also frequently cut off women's heads - but perhaps for different reasons...?

sydney
7/10/2013 06:20:42 am

Thank you! I see no problem with my body and how I look, and yet I am (almost) constantly subjected to back handed comments and judgment by other people. I have never been able to get it. I feel so beautiful. So wonderful. So powerful for loving who I am. But society makes me feel like I am in the wrong for loving myself. Like they think I should want to change! This post has reconfirmed by belief in myself! Thank you thank you!! So much.

Supavillain link
7/10/2013 10:01:41 am

This is the single most amazing thing I've read all day. This, like you, is beautiful.


Comments are closed.
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    Virgie Tovar

    Virgie Tovar, MA is one of the nation's leading experts and lecturers on fat discrimination and body image. She is the founder of Babecamp (a 4 week online course focused on helping people break up with diet culture) and the editor of Hot & Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion (Seal Press, 2012). She writes about the intersections of size, identity, sexuality and politics. See more updates on Facebook.

    WHY IS THERE NO COMMENTS SECTION?
    I have permanently closed the comment section on my blog as of 8/20/15 so that I can better utilize the time I had previously dedicated to moderating comments. I encourage folks who have thoughts about my work to go out and have a conversation with someone about what you loved (or hated.. boo) about my writing over coffee.    

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